Fall 2017

Fall 2017

Friday, May 9, 2014

My favorite day...



When I was in grammar school, around the third grade, a classmate of mine had a younger brother who had polio. The little guy was in kindergarten and walked with the aid of heavy leather and metal braces. One first Friday, when the whole school was attending Mass, this little boy was walking up the long church aisle when his crutches hit a slick spot on the marble and he fell flat on his face. Without skipping a beat, and within seconds, he maneuvered his braces and was back up and walking down the aisle as if nothing happened. I remember thinking, even at the tender age of eight, this was courage.

Years later, in college, a young woman with cerebral palsy was a freshman when I was a sophomore. Sophomores picked freshman as "little sisters". I picked this young lady. 

Somehow, I have always felt these events were some sort of preparation for me...preludes to coming events.

Years ago my mother-in-law gave me a book of Erma Bombeck essays. She wanted me to read the one entitled "The Special Mother". I love the poem...except for the last part about the mirror...I just don't identify with the ending...it just doesn't fit. I know that not all mothers of special needs children can "handle" it. I have known people who placed their children in foster care. I know that for me, after the initial shock, they couldn't pry that little bundle of pink out of my arms. I don't think that makes me special...I think it just makes me a mom. All moms are special to their children!

Mother's Day...it is my favorite day...for the last twenty seven years I have been a full time, stay at home mother. As the years go by, I find myself pacing myself, trying to conserve energy for the future. Some days, I only have enough time and energy to be a mom. Other days, I can do a little stitching or hooking. Lately, I have been working on Mugwump Woolies holiday dolls. I can't seem to fit it all in, so I have been away from the computer. I wanted to come here today to wish you all the very best and happiest Mother's Day! 

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The Special Mother
by Erma Bombeck

Most women become mothers by accident, some by choice, a few by social pressures and a couple by habit.
This year nearly 100,000 women will become mothers of handicapped children. Did you ever wonder how mothers of handicapped children are chosen?
Somehow I visualize God hovering over earth selecting his instruments for propagation with great care and deliberation. As He observes, He instructs His angels to make notes in a giant ledger.
"Armstrong, Beth; son. Patron saint...give her Gerard. He's used to profanity."
"Forrest, Marjorie; daughter. Patron saint, Cecelia."
"Rutledge, Carrie; twins. Patron saint, Matthew."
Finally He passes a name to an angel and smiles, "Give her a handicapped child."
The angel is curious. "Why this one God? She's so happy."
"Exactly," smiles God, "Could I give a handicapped child to a mother who does not know laughter? That would be cruel."
"But has she patience?" asks the angel.
"I don't want her to have too much patience or she will drown in a sea of self-pity and despair. Once the shock and resentment wears off, she'll handle it."
"I watched her today. She has that feeling of self and independence that is so rare and so necessary in a mother. You see, the child I'm going to give her has her own world. She has to make her live in her world and that's not going to be easy."
"But, Lord, I don't think she even believes in you." God smiles, "No matter, I can fix that. This one is perfect - she has just enough selfishness." The angel gasps - "selfishness? is that a virtue?"
God nods. "If she can't separate herself from the child occasionally, she'll never survive. Yes, here is a woman whom I will bless with a child less than perfect. She doesn't realize it yet, but she is to be envied. She will never take for granted a 'spoken word'". She will never consider a "step" ordinary. When her child says 'Momma' for the first time, she will be present at a miracle, and will know it!"
"I will permit her to see clearly the things I see...ignorance, cruelty, prejudice....and allow her to rise above them. She will never be alone. I will be at her side every minute of every day of her life, because she is doing My work as surely as if she is here by My side".
"And what about her Patron saint?" asks the angel, his pen poised in mid-air.
God smiles, "A mirror will suffice."

********************************************

The first time Annie tied her shoe by herself they called me from school so she could tell me the big news. She was fifteen. I cried happy tears.

Have a wonderful Mother's Day! 

Enjoy the day,
Robyn

24 comments:

  1. Robyn and Annie Pie,
    You have an amazing way with words. My heart is so full of emotions and I am not very good at expressing them. I was the same way in 3rd and 4th grades and upwards. I always took sides with those considered to be less fortunate. My Sandy is our Special Angel and at the almost age of 50 she still calls me mommy in a very childish manner. I worry too because she often tells me "mommy, I don't know what I would do without you". For me, it is the other way around. She is my best friend, partner in crime, confident and #1 daughter and we share the same likes and dislikes.

    I fully enjoyed Erma Bombeck's writing, 'The Special Mother'.
    For me, Sandy is a Blessing and I am NO Saint.

    Happy Mother's Day with Peace and Blessings to all,
    Barb & Sandy pants

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  2. Thank You for sharing Robyn. Your words are beautiful and I'm sending you and Annie a great big HUG!

    Happy Mothers Day!
    Audrey

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  3. As you know I spend my days working with handicapped adults. There are all types of mothers I would not call any of them bad as they made hard decisions. All I know is I have been blessed to work with these basically young adults, they have enriched my life more than I have theirs. They remind me to take life as it is and be really excited about the small things. kindness counts and friends are everywhere
    happy mother's day
    Cathy

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  4. Happy Mother's Day Robyn, in His wisdom, God chose you for Annie and it was a wise choice. Blessings on your journey with Annie. She is truly a beautiful gift.
    Hugs,
    JB

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  5. Happy Mother's Day! I admire you, your husband and Annie. I too am the mother of a special needs (now) adult. A long road with lots of twists and turns, but hopefully well traveled.

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  6. Happy Mother's Day to you Robyn, I hope you enjoy your favorite day!

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  7. oh many a happy, frustrated, exhausted, jubilant, blessed tear have I cried and would not trade a day spent mothering for anything in the world......enjoy your favorite day!

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  8. Robin, I just read your Mother's Day blog. I was so moved by your devotion to Annie. she is lovely.

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  9. You are an amazing mother. And so inspiring to the rest of us. Thanks for sharing -- you are also a wonderful writer. Happy Mother's Day!

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  10. I wish all children had the devotion and love of a mother such as you. Annie is truly blessed. Enjoy your special day.

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  11. Annie is such a blessing, sweetest girl. Enjoy the special day with loved ones, Hugs Francine.

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  12. You and your daughter are blessings.....for each other. Happy Mother's Day!

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  13. Happy Mother's Day! Your Annie has such a wonderful smile wishing both a great weekend!

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  14. What a wonderful and moving post. So many blessings. Wishing you, dear Annie and your DH a wonderful Mother's Day!

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  15. Oh, Robyn,
    This post made me cry. You have such a beautiful way with words.
    Have the happiest Mother's Day ever.
    Hugs to you and Annie :)
    Lauren

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  16. .....thank you for enriching my Mothers' Day with your articulate, insightful words......enjoy the special day with Annie-Pie.

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  17. Oh Robyn.... So well said... Special indeed~

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  18. Happy Mother's Day to a most special Mom!
    Beautiful photo of two very beautiful spirits!
    xo

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  19. Very special post.
    Happy Mother's Day, Robyn. ;)
    Rose

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  20. Happy Mother's Day Robyn. You are a special mom indeed! Janice

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  21. Dear Robyn,
    Though Mother's Day is officially over, I want to wish you a Blessed one anyway.....and to Thank You for sharing such a beautiful post....from your deepest heart place! It truly touched me my friend!!! You and Annie are treasures indeed!!!
    Warmest Hugs to you and Annie Pie~
    Julie

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  22. *****no...the mirror part fits, only you are too close to the living of your life to see what others view in your devotion to your family! yes, you and many other mother's
    of children with special needs are indeed very special yourselves. the compassionate world understands these virtues and smiles in response to the vision of hope that is the basis of human nature but all too often forgotten! sometime get a copy of the book, "bubbles," by beverly sills and read the part about when she enrolled her daughter at the boston school for the deaf run by the sisters of st. joseph. all she wanted was to hear her daughter, unable to speak at the time, to utter the word, "momma." blessed mother's day greetings to you and
    all women who have given of their mind and heart to the special needs child in your
    life!

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  23. What touching words Robyn . . . a belated Mother's Day to you . . . tho every day is mother's day!
    L

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